A Desolate Disease

#MyThursdayThing 

The cases of Covid-19 in the country are on the rise. As the lockdown begins to lift, everyone’s probability of getting infected has also dramatically risen. Some people who have no other option carry their sanitizers and their masks and venture out with the hope of coming back home safe. Those who have an option are staying put at home because it is better and safer that way. Covid-19 may not be that fatal but it definitely is a very depressing disease.

I stayed in my home (Kanpur) till I was 18 and then left for higher studies. In the period that followed I stayed with my aunt, then as a paying guest, then all by myself, etc, at different places in different situations. I missed home, my parents and grandparents often, but most of all I missed them when I was unwell. In the discomfort of the illness, the kind words, the care and concern, the company, someone sitting by your side was all I needed and it never came close to what I had experienced at home. My grandmother had been my Florence Nightingale.

My grandmother, though a very stern person, was known to convert into this soft-hearted empathetic caregiver, should anyone at home be unwell.  She would sit by the bedside through the day, checking your pulse or fever and keep checking in at night too. If the temperatures rose high, she would place cold towels on the head, would feed you good, nutritious food, tell stories and even play cards. An otherwise curt, no-nonsense lady had this nurturing side to her that we all adored. As a child I would remember how I secretly loved falling sick. I was never upset that I would not be allowed to play or go to school, because the pampering and attention one would get when unwell was great fun too. To make a confession here, there were times when I thanked God when I got fever because then not only was I saved from homework woes but for a few days no one at home would scold me for anything.

Everyone, when ill wants that extra care. The body is weak, the mind plays games, it is always a good idea then to have company.  Someone who can keep a watch on the illness and its parameters and also chit-chat with the sick when needed.  That’s what caregivers do.

However, Covid-19, is a sadistic and lonesome disease. If a person is suspected to have contracted it or been in areas where infected people may have been, he/she has to isolate himself/herself till the results of the test come out. Isolation or self-quarantine means at home but not in contact with anyone. My friend recently quarantined herself for 14 days when she returned home after doing relief work in a Covid hot-spot. Her daily experience of being all by herself in her room for 2 weeks was something I witnessed closely. Definitely not something I was envious of.

A journalist recently tweeted her experience when she tested positive and had to go into an isolation ward at a Covid centre. There was no AC in the room, only a table fan, no TV and her phone was her only companion. She was given food  and hot water from time to time. There would be a bang on the door, a person in PPE would come, keep the food and water at a distance and leave. Her temperature and other symptoms were regularly monitored. The only time she was allowed out of the ward was for a Covid test. She safely made it to the other side and was discharged when her tests finally came negative. All the time that she was unwell, her phone and video calls with her family were the only love and care she received. 

However, if a person with co-morbidities and/or weak immune system gets Covid-19, the option most likely would be hospitalisation, ICU, maybe ventilator and who knows whether he/she would survive. What happens in this scenario? The family members drop the patient at the hospital and then don’t know when they can meet him/her again or whether they will meet again. For the patient everything happens in a click, no one gets time to say goodbyes and they don’t even know if they will come out of the place. Since the fatality rate is low, most make it to the other side but with an experience that is likely to change them forever.

If you get hunted down by Covid-19, you fight it out all alone! No physical support, love, presence of any of your loved ones… a very, very scary situation to be in.  Therefore I call Covid-19 more of a desolate/lonely disease then a dreaded disease.

 

In my mind I would definitely not like to be in this situation nor want to see any of my loved ones there. So my mantra, have haldi and adrak (turmeric and ginger) water, exercise, paint, listen to music and stay at home. No point, stepping out and risking, if not for anything for the sake of the love and nurturing that I missed so much when I was unwell and away from home. My grandmother’s love and nurturing was at another level but anything close to that kind of attention will also not be available at all, at home or at hospital to anyone whatsoever.

If you get Covid-19, the recovery there on will be a desolate journey. Something that I am prepared for in my head but do not wish it on myself or anyone… Staying home and staying safe maybe the best option we all have.

©shubhra

#4  June 18, 2020

#MyThursdayThing will be published every Thursday, on my blog https://shubhrathoughts.blogspot.com/  and shared on my social media handles.